shake it fast!

I've loved dancing for as long as I can remember. I remember when my parents gave me a leotard and tights for Christmas along with my first ever ballet class at the Cleveland School of Dance. Before that, my sister, cousins, friends and I would "choreograph" (read: talk about) dances and shows and perform them on the "stage" (read: bench) in nanny and papa's basement. Thinking back on it now I feel like I was probably always the one that instigated this and dragged others with me. We played "Burnin' Down the House," and "Mousercize" records on their record player and thought we were so freaking cool.

I remember my awesome outfit for the jazz routine in my first recital. There's still a picture of it floating around somewhere. Hot pink. Rainbow Sequins. Silver shoes. Sequin Headband. Hawt.

I remember playing my dad's Cathy Dennis "Move to This" CD over and over again in the living room to practice my moves.

I can still remember so many dances from all my years of classes and cheerleading... to Big Band, Rusted Root, 2 guys banging on pots, pans, and tables (seriously), rainforest sounds, Coolio, U2, REO Speedwagon, the Beastie Boys. Wearing bleach-stained unitards, chevron pants, ballet skirts that my mom sewed for me, anything that my (eccentric) dance teacher could find in bulk at the thrift store.

That was such a big part of my life. I bet my mom and dad can remember a lot of what I'm talking about. I even sucked both of them into dancing at one point or another (mom, just for a class I think; dad, for multiple rehearsals and a public performance!)

Stopping dancing (in high school, when I decided the weekly classes and rehearsals took too much time away from friends and boyfriends) is probably one of the only things I regret in my life. Since I stopped formally dancing, my personal career has continued. Sophomore year of college my roommate and our closest friends choreographed a dance for... ourselves... because... we were bored? and rehearsed for hours a night until the person beneath us complained. In addition to David's and my sometimes nightly dance parties in our living room, I also convinced him to perform a choreographed first dance at our wedding. I convinced a team at work that we should make a video for one of our clients with all of the popular dances commonly done at weddings so that they could practice and participate with their family. Dancing when I was pregnant with Ellie was the thing that made me happiest and made us laugh the most. Really, a pregnant woman dancing is a w e s o m e. In the first few weeks when Ellie was only happy if she was being bounced around, we learned that putting on music and bouncing to the beat makes it so much more tolerable, fun even. You should try it--feeling grumpy? Stuck doing something that you don't want to do? Click this link and shake it fast. You'll feel better.

I hope Ellie loves to dance. I hope she'll ask me to make up shows with her. Maybe she won't want to take classes, but she'll be expected to participate in family dance parties. And hopefully she'll teach me how to dougie.

tummy time in months

As her half birthday approaches, I can't stop myself from looking and thinking back to the beginning. It's unbelievable how much she's changed and how much she's changed my life.

Click on the picture to make it bigger so you can really appreciate her beauty :)

smorgasbord

I didn't forget about this place, but I haven't found the time (or motivation) to hang around here. A few quick updates and a super cute pic of the girl:

• Everyone tells you they grow up so fast, but it's unbelievable to see it happen. It took so long for her to grow and develop during the 40 long weeks of pregnancy, and I didn't realize all the craziness and change that would happen in just the first few months of her life. I can't wait to order invites to her first birthday party. (what up, tiny prints?!)
  
• She's over 5 months old, has her very own high-chair (thanks to a well-planned ebay purchase by dad) and is slightly obsessed with any food that is in her reach. Actually, she's pretty much obsessed with any object that is in or out of her reach and is letting us know by attempting to dive-bomb off our laps in the direction of everything she sees. She's enjoyed avocado and sweet potato meals and thinks both are finger foods.
• She's getting pretty good at sitting up on her own (unless she's practicing her aforementioned dive-bomb technique) and figured out how to roll all the way around which makes her much more mobile than we are ready for. I'm excited for all that is to come, but can't believe our little girl might be thinking about crawling and walking soon?!

• She loves Alden, her feet, when people cough, the remote control, jumping (like crazy!) in her jumperoo, standing up in her walker, napping in our bed, peeing with her diaper off, and clawing the crap out of our faces in the morning.
• David and I are still a little lost and more exhausted/disheveled than I'd like to admit, but I wouldn't change anything. Life is wonderful!
  

my mess

Last night, after Ellie was in bed and I was sitting on the couch enjoying a rootbeer float (they are probably better than you remember) David was marching around the house trying to clean up.

David: "Please don't put your shoes on the kitchen table."
Me: "Why would I put my shoes on the table?"
David: "Exactly, why would you put your shoes on the table?"
Me: ::overcome by uncontrollable laughter::

I've been thinking that I should stray from my usual adorable posts of Ellie pictures to show you a broader view of what our life has become since this beautiful little girl stepped in and took over. Luckily for me I haven't made the time to snap any shots so instead I'll just list a few things that make up our mess.

Me:
Hair=hot mess. It hasn't been cut since... January? I need to order some sort of product that won't congeal on my scalp the morning after a shower. Ellie and I have matching cradle cap.
Sometimes I try to put on mascara. Sometimes it makes me feel better about going to work in the morning. Unfortunately I don't clean it off and it just adds to the bags under my eyes the next day. I look so tired.
My teeth are yellow. Probably has something to do with excessive amounts of Starbucks consumed in the past 4 months.
My lips are so thin. This is only more evident since David and Ellie have luscious lips.
Muscle tone: non-existent.
Clothes: I think I have 2 pairs of non-maternity pants that fit, but they're linen and get too easily wrinkled (when they're balled up on the floor). Sometimes I can find an unwrinkled shirt for work. Sometimes it is even stain free.
I've exercised 3 times since Ellie's been alive.

Kitchen:
Dirty dishes and bottles out the wazoo. Waiting to be loaded into the dishwasher or washed by hand.
A fridge filled with healthy groceries that never get cooked.
Pizza boxes.
Starbucks cups.
Baby toys.
Baby coupons.

Living Room:
Mail.
Bills.
Bras.
Fabric pieces from various half started projects.
A floor that's been swiffered and vacuumed twice since Ellie's been alive. (Ellie is almost 5 months old, and this used to be done on a weekly basis)
Cereal bowls on the floor. (Remnants of Alden's morning treat)
Spoons on any horizontal surface. (For some reason, the spoon is not part of Alden's morning treat and has to be removed so he can get to the cereal bowl..?)
Baby toys.
Baby books.

Bathroom:
Clothes.
Stray hairs. Everywhere. (I've been checking for bald spots since 3 months postpartum)

Ellie's Room:
Old clothes. (Washed and bagged and ready to go... somewhere!)
Baby toys.
I don't even know what's in her completely disorganized closet.

Purple Room:
The rest of the fabric pieces from half finished projects.
Baby toys.

Our Room:
O-M-G. I don't even think I can describe the explosion that occurred on the floor of my side of the room over the last few weeks. My parents might be the only ones that can vouch for how messy I can get. You can't see the floor.

So I started laughing uncontrollably during that conversation last night because in that very instant I realized how completely out of control our life had become. How out of control I had become. I also realized it's all my fault. In an effort to ease my guilt about being away from Ellie during the day and on top of busy busy weeks at work, when I finally get home, I'm completely exhausted with being responsible or self-controlled. The only thing I can find energy for is Miss Ellie (and, yes, making Tiny Prints cards). David, bless his heart, has been trying so hard to keep some sort of cleanliness or healthiness in our lives. He asks me to pick up my clothes, and sometimes even picks them up for me (and then has to deal with me trying to find any of my stuff that he put in the wrong place). He volunteers to run to the grocery or cook any dinner but I'm usually quicker to choose take-out. He pesters me to go to the gym, get a hair cut or go buy new clothes. But when push comes to shove, I'd rather just be with Ellie than doing any of those things. I know I need to get better about this, if only because I want to be a good role model for Ellie and I think it's important for her to know that she should take pride in herself and her belongings. But how do I get there? Suggestions welcome!

swoon!

why can't she wear a tutu everyday?

you know you're a new mom if...

-you consider it a good night's sleep if you sleep for more than 4 continuous hours.
-everything you do revolves around a 3 hour interval.
-you're used to driving in the car with no music because you need to make sure your baby is still breathing in the backseat.
-you consider yourself on time if you're less than 15 minutes late.
-your bedroom floor is covered with each day's failed (read: too small) attempts at looking work-appropriate (or just appropriate, period).
-you think it's okay to talk to people about (your own) tearing, cutting, dripping & pumping
-you think it's okay to talk to people about (your baby's) pooping, puking & miniscule new skill development (she's picking things up!).
-you think starbucks' grande (and venti!) drinks are small.

what else?

i'm heeeeeere!

Even though I could, I'm not going to make this post about the continual struggles of working and managing Ellie... which are only more complicated this week by David's boss' request that he work a few nights in addition to his normal work week...

Instead, I'm proud to announce that we have a new little chatterbox in our house and that our quiet little snugglebug is making her presence known more everyday, filling our lives with a new little personality that is just starting to emerge. Ellie's become quite a little squeal monster lately. It seems like every evening she has one period when no matter what we're doing with her she's squealing in response. She squeals higher and higher each time, a little bit louder every now and again, and it leaves us cracking up. It's so much fun that she's finding her voice. I like to pretend that we're having conversations. She must be communicating something, right?! Sometimes she tells me about her day with the boys at Laura's and other days we make plans for shopping trips. We've been doing our best to capture this on a video, but somehow she stops whenever the camera is around--even if she doesn't see it! She's so in tune, I know.

We were able to spend time with older babies this weekend, and I spent Friday at work learning about typical play development in children. So far, it's been hard for us to realistically see our future with Ellie--we're so wrapped up in diapers! and feeding! and burping! oh my! But after seeing older babies laughing, taking their first steps, and bopping Aldy on the nose, and watching videos of little girls having tea parties ("I need some shuka") and playing with play kitchens I'm starting to think of all the crazy things we have to come. The least of which should be rolling over... and that should be coming soon, right?
Ellie's playful voice, and her newly evidenced frustration with being unable to control her hands the way she wants seem to be the beginnings of her social development. She's already starting to interact more with us and the world and it's crazy fun. She's had her first crush (TT), her first slow dance (Chris) and her first kiss (Nolan!). Someone needs to tell her to slow down.